Hmmm, I get what you're saying. I could clarify in that final paragraph.

She shuddered, christening her baby boy with tears, and aching with the knowledge that her body had let her down. A natural birth was so important to her, and she'd failed. Her pain was delicious, flavoured with exhaustion, self-loathing, and regret, with a side-order of lingering physical discomfort. Just the way I liked it.